Flip Flops

Today I am greatful for

~ Flip Flops and how good it feels to have them on.
~ A long weekend coming up.
~ Our pool getting put up this weekend.
~ Our free "real" pool.
~ George's intelligence that he knows how to put it up himself.
~ The pretty flowers doing well on my porch.
~ Running into an old friend who is also a hairdresser. Just as I was thinking about how I wish I had a hairdresser I could trust with cutting my hair short.
~ My co-worker in Lima who I am forming a friendship with and how much fun it is to talk to her.
~ Being aware of how I feel insecure when I am around her because she is pretty and thin.
~ Still being aware of how low my self esteem is and still brewing and what I should do about it.
~ Yummy iced capps from Kewpee
~ Finding out Shannan does belly dancing... I never would have guessed, how great that is.
~ Seeing how when I read about the belly dancing I instantly thought fun then immediatly told myself I would look gross doing it.
~ Awareness.
~ Resistance
~ Protections
~ Love
~ Laughter
~ Potential.
~ All of you .

Gotta get my but into action. I am sure fighting this !

Holding Pattern

Today's list is what I am aware of.....

~ The girly in me screaming for some attention.
~ The comfort I am finding in my old friend food.
~ The shame,guilt and anger I feel after eating EVERY TIME.
~ The self hate talking I have going all the time.
~ The way I give up when things start working.
~ Knowing I am at a point that I need to make so new choices.
~ Feeling hopeless, depressed and knowing I am choosing it.
~ Aware that sometimes it is easier and alot more comfortable to be unhappy.
~ I am aware of how much abundance and resources I have at my fingertips if I just reach out.

Spring

Today I am most grateful for

~ Eric rolling over this morning. What an amazing little man he is to me.
~ That there is such a thing as "unclaimed money" in Michigan and someone owed me $200. Yipee....
~ The "real" pool that was given to us for free and the hard work George has put into getting it ready to install.
~ Being completely aware of my fear, panic and dread that is coming witht he thought of my mother in law taking Eric for the day alone.
~ Learning to live with that for now. And knowing it is something that will be there until I feel more comfortable with her.
~ Feeling like I can ask God to help protect Eric while she has him.
~ The possibilty of having what I want once I choose to let it come to me. ie friends, strong connections and things like a camping trip.
~ Awareness , Awareness, Awareness.
~ Ok, not such a great list....